Always mount a scratch turkey

[sylvar]

(If the subject line disturbs you, perhaps you've never heard the proverb "Always mount a scratch monkey".)

Jodi's family will be having Thanksgiving with us this year.
Thanksgiving is a meal at which a roast turkey is served.
A roast turkey to feed them all and have leftovers weighs about twelve pounds.
Cooking twelve pounds of meat in an oven can be a little tricky.
I am the cook in this household.
I am a vegetarian.
Stop me when you see where this is going.

So to gain some experience before inflicting my beast-roasting skills on very nice in-laws who really don't deserve food poisoning or even dry turkey, I'm practicing.

I will be using Alton Brown's recipe for brined roast turkey, starting with making a brine tonight, putting the turkey into the brine tomorrow night, and finally roasting the turkey Saturday.

I have no idea how to carve this thing.

Comments

[sylvar.livejournal.com]

2.5) yes, I have a probe thermometer, and following his advice I will tell it to beep at me when the inside of the breast reaches 161°F. (The oven's temperature is ±30°F from the dial, generally.)

4) How far does it need to coast? I'm going with AB's "15 minutes", probably.

4.5) Ah, but frozen turkey is 99¢/lb. Hard to beat that. I don't know how much edible meat that is by weight, but even at a 50% loss rate, that's still cheap. Cornish game hens, on the other hand...

[osh1013.livejournal.com]

2.5) Cool. You have, and you're aware, which is all one could hope for.

4) "Until it's finished coasting", generally. Watch the temp. It'll keep rising for a little bit, then stop rising and slowly start falling again. That's about the point you want to devour. "about fifteen minutes" is pretty much spot on, but since you're doing a test-run anyways use the opportunity to observe.

This is, btw, the meat equivalent of "taking your scrambled eggs off the stove while they're still a bit wet, cause they'll keep cooking on the plate." Same logic holds for pasta. Holds for pretty much everything, really.

4.5) Yes, turkey is cheap, but Game Hens are soooo much tastier. Worth the expense, IMHO. 'Sides, I like giving a guest the option to rip their own legs off. I'm just nice that way. ;)