Always mount a scratch turkey

[sylvar]

(If the subject line disturbs you, perhaps you've never heard the proverb "Always mount a scratch monkey".)

Jodi's family will be having Thanksgiving with us this year.
Thanksgiving is a meal at which a roast turkey is served.
A roast turkey to feed them all and have leftovers weighs about twelve pounds.
Cooking twelve pounds of meat in an oven can be a little tricky.
I am the cook in this household.
I am a vegetarian.
Stop me when you see where this is going.

So to gain some experience before inflicting my beast-roasting skills on very nice in-laws who really don't deserve food poisoning or even dry turkey, I'm practicing.

I will be using Alton Brown's recipe for brined roast turkey, starting with making a brine tonight, putting the turkey into the brine tomorrow night, and finally roasting the turkey Saturday.

I have no idea how to carve this thing.

Comments

"faking it"

[bethlynn.livejournal.com]

I suggest "faking it"

Call around the groceries in your area. Smaller high-end groceries rather than supermarkets if you have a choice. Ask for a pre-cooked turkey kit. Most come with a precooked bird, stuffing, gravy, and cranberry sauce. I suggest you stretch the gravy with a can of chicken broth. For a more realistic effect, pour another can of chicken broth over you bird as you put it into the oven. Also pour chicken broth over your stuffing to make it moist. You can never have enough chicken broth.

I did this for thanksgiving and christmas of 2003. Serves 8 with leftovers.

And as silly as it may sound, they make electric carvers for a reason.

Re: "faking it"

[osh1013.livejournal.com]

they make electric carvers for a reason

Yea.. for folx who can't be bothered to keep their knives sharp. I think there's a special level of Hell reserved for such folx, but then I'm just an opinionated snob that way. *grin*